Not Yet.......

On June 1st, last year, my dad went to heaven.  A few weeks before he was set free, I went to see him at the alzheimers facility where he was.  I leaned in close..."Dad, I"m praying you get to go to heaven soon."  Just a few minutes before he made no sense, but this time?  He looked right at me and the tears came immediately.  "Me too," he said and we touched foreheads.  It stabbed me right in the heart to see this man who'd so capably taken care of me, cheered me on, loved me, be so frail.  But right then, God let me know, my father knew what was what when it counted.

This early morning I look out the window of the home I live in because of my dad's kind heart to others and see the workers beginning for the day.  "God.  WHY?  Why can't you just make my mother give the house to me?", I asked Him last year.  It would be so much easier on me.  Soon after that prayer,  the insurance company ordered major improvements to be done on the house before they would insure it again, improvements I would not have been able to afford, had I been given ownership.  But I don't own it, because my Father whispered, "Just wait.  You watch.  You'll see.  It's not ready yet."

So, this morning I smile to myself.  These workers?  It's a pastor and his sons.  Isn't that just the the Father heart of God to send "family" to help? And they've been so kind to do things they weren't even hired to do, because they know I live alone and sometimes that feels vulnerable.   They'll be renting my garage to put their equipment in after they're finished on my house.  It comforts me to see them coming and going,

Sometimes?  "Wait" is just another way to say "I love you, child."  I don't know what the future holds for this house or me, but I've learned Who holds it and I trust Him with the waits.